The Big Dance

When the bucket list is completed and the visits have taken place, it’s time to lay oneself down and move gracefully from this earthly existence to the spirit world. But what if you just don’t want to go?

Such a situation has become real for myself over the last 4 weeks. Not, I might add, that it’s my bucket list or visits to which I refer. No, the person due to depart is close to me and clearly has decided to delay departure for as long as humanly possible.

I wrote about my friend sometime ago and referred to his dire situation in battling Aplastic Anemia, which at the time was some 7 years in duration. Now, two years on, he is about to die.

This has been a story of great courage and enormous challenge. To see what the human body can withstand is both amazing and bewildering. Amazing because my friend should really have never lasted this long, but continued to astound the doctors and ourselves, with his determination and strength of character. Bewildering  because this disease renders the body susceptible to infection constantly and yet could not bring my friend down no matter what.

And so it has come to this. After many false starts, and indeed finishes, the time has come to say farewell.

In this, the forthcoming death of my friend, there is great strength to be gained reflecting  upon how the initiative was seized and the power of controlling one’s will was never surrendered. Even under enormous pain and pressure through advice and love, my friend still pressed on and took responsibility for his outcome.

When we reach time for “The Big Dance”, should we have just some of the inner strength shown by my friend, then we will also die happy and complete.

bristlehound 2016

2 thoughts on “The Big Dance

  1. Ashen, I’m astounded at the strength shown by people about to die. Balancing this, is the cold hard reality which is not coming back once it’s over.
    I have personally learnt so much from this event. What challenges me is touching the actual reality of nothing beyond. We are taught to think and plan ahead, be aware of up-coming situations and whilst spiritual beliefs provide comfort, they don’t replace the lack of everything.
    No weather, no people, no laughter, no thought – simply nothing.
    Tragic deaths often occur without notice. They cause instant and deep responses. However booking your death, be it a week or a day, is macabre and causes questions to be asked of oneself.
    Thanks for your comment.B

  2. My old dad is putting up a fight now.
    The great spirit of your friend reminds me of the Villanelle by Dylan Thomas …

    Do not go gentle into that good night,
    Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
    Rage, rage against the dying of the light …

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